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She Has Next Door Neighbor Envy
Little Susie had big problems. First of all she considered herself too short. Her next door neighbor, Tara, was just the right height. Not too tall to wear stiletto heels. Not too short to play a good game of basketball. Susie had neighbor envy. She was weighted down with it.
For example, Tara’s grass always looked good. Her husband took care of fertilizing it, cutting it and trimming around the house and patio. Susie’s grass, on the other hand, looked bare in spots and weedy in spots where it wasn’t bare. Her grass looked like it was cut with the echo chainsaw her husband bought to trim trees with. Of course, it wasn’t. The efficient chainsaw was used only for trimming those trees at the lot line of the two yards.
Tara’s husband cut the grass every weekend. He trimmed it and edged it. It looked fantastic. After he cut it, he watered it and fertilized it. Susie’s husband only cut theirs when it grew so high he was afraid they’d be fined.
It was Susie’s shopping day. She wondered what Tara ate every day. She was slender in addition to being tall. Susie was not tall or slender. She looked down at her waistline and frowned. Her exercise routine wasn’t working. She wondered if Tara did exercises.
Susie was so happy the day she and her husband bought a twin sleigh bed for their daughter. It was a soft white in French Provincial style and perfect for a little girls room. She called Tara to come over and see it. Tara complimented the bed highly and then they had coffee together. Of course, Susie thought Tara’s brand of coffee was better, but oh well at least she now had a sleigh bed for her daughter.
The next time Tara came over for coffee, her two daughters were with her. The three girls had fun playing with dolls and playing video games. Susie was so happy to know that Tara’s girls shared a video game system while her little daughter had one for just her. The kids were just happy to play and didn’t think about toy envy.
After Tara and her little girls went home, she sat and played with her daughter for awhile. Her daughter informed her that they had liked her sleigh bed a lot. She went on to tell Susie that they each had sleigh bed in their own bedrooms. Susie felt that old next door neighbor envy rising up in her throat again. At least Tara didn’t brag about her possessions she thought to herself.
The very next morning Susie and her daughter went to the mall. In the furniture store Susie’s daughter asked what furniture they needed. When they looked at sleigh beds, the child was surprised. But I have one she said. Her mother screeched out that she was buying one for the guest room. On the day of delivery Susie also had two sleigh beds in her home.
MAD MEN – “I can’t believe I’m going to miss this!” AKA Lois and the Lawnmower 3.06
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